Coulda Sworn There Were Some Goalposts Around Here Somewhere…

by matttbastard

Report? We don’t need no steenkin’ report – we can totally trust the word of the honorable, unbiased Gen. Colin Powell Petraeus. Don’t ask me why John Cole is acting so Shrilly McHippieson; Norm Coleman guaran-damn-tees the lurkers have emailed him the charts.

Related: Cernig does his best soothsayer impression. So, same time next FU, everyone?

Updated 09/08: WaPo:

In a preview of his report to Congress next week, Gen. David H. Petraeus yesterday expressed disappointment in the lack of progress toward political reconciliation in Iraq. Administration officials said he wants to return to Washington for another assessment in six months to allow more time for Iraqi politics to catch up with what Petraeus regards as rapidly improving security conditions.

Yep. See you @ the next FU photo-op. Maybe by then they’ll have found where the goalposts went.

Updated 2: From the same WaPo article:

One official said Petraeus will offer “a fair amount of data” in his presentation to Congress, including charts demonstrating how violence has diminished since additional U.S. troops began establishing a presence in Baghdad neighborhoods this year. Among the charts prepared for him is a series of color-coded maps of the capital that show a decreased “density of ethno-sectarian attacks” at three-month increments beginning last December. The first map shows much of the city covered with blots of bright red, indicating violent “hot spots.” By August, all the red is gone, and most of the city map is a peaceful green with only a few scattered islands of watchful yellow.

And I bet he also has a few PowerPoint slides showing what are clearly mobile bioweapon labs.

Powell.  Goes.  To. The.  Fucking.  UN.

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Slacker Friday

by matttbastard

Various articles that have kept me entertained/sane today. Ugh, and boy, did I ever need entertainment/sanity – don’t ask. Suffice to say, my desk at work was in serious jeopardy of suffering a similar fate to the one at home.

  • Elizabeth Sullivan looks at the disturbingly bourgeois bona fides of the typical Islamic radical (less likely to be a Kalashnikov-wielding, terror-camp trained firebrand than a parent’s-basement-residing, acne-scarred LARPer wearing expensive Nikes.) Related: Olivier Roy addresses the enigma of middle class Muslim radicalism in Europe. His conclusion: contemporary Islamic fundamentalism (or ‘neofundamentalism’) is “a consequence of the globalization and Westernization of Islam”.
  • Porno-riffic sexpert Susie Bright muses on Larry Craig and the Cuckquean wife.
  • Britters, Avril and any other other young, blonde pop starlets with a penchant for low-slung trousers better not visit Mansfield, LA anytime soon (*ahem*).

And in honour of the weekend:

Happy Friday, y’all.

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Words Matter

by matttbastard

Reporter John Robertson and the editors over at The Scotsman appear to misunderstand the difference between ‘having sex’ (which implies that consent was involved) and ‘sexual contact’; this distinction becomes especially important when one is reporting on an ongoing murder investigation.

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